journal: lessons to learn – Page 16

other colours

Posted on March 9, 2016March 9, 2016 by arlee

Well, there’s still blue in it 🙂

In doing Jane Dunnewold’s Creative Strength Training course online, i’ve been looking at a LOT of old work. I do this regularly actually, but this time am looking at it with purpose, rather than just waxing nostalgic for the days when i was “free-er”, had no expectations and no expertise!

Back in 2008, i had started a specific sketchbook that was just “markmaking”. Not the kind that involves puddles of paint dragged through with various implements, or charcoal done with feathers, or sticks and mud swooped around (i hated those exercises in my textile art program in the 90’s, and i still do), but conscious use of line, shape and colour. I did use various media from metallic magic markers to pastels and watercolours, and thoroughly enjoyed the process and results.

Now i’m looking at this one in particular. The shapes and variations excite my thready expectations, and the colours are rich. I played with my photo editing program (basic Irfanview, free and easy to use) at the time too, and came up with all these variations.

The original:
A change of orientation:

Special effects, mirroring:

Half of the design is lost on that one, but oh well. Didn’t notice at the time, don’t care 🙂

Kaleidoscopic:

VERY Zandra Rhodes-ish!

A circular effect:

What about in greyscale?

Hmm, maybe in more extreme contrasts.

Sepia, ie the “bland, beige and boring” naturals and neutrals i use with fabrics from rust processes and ecoprints:

So many possibilities! I’m going to be doing some small samples and mockups, though i’m leaning to those brighter colours—if my natural dyes don’t co-operate fully, then i’ll add in some procion as well.

I’m realizing too as i go through Jane’s course, that for me, it’s more what the thread can do and how it’s used, rather than any colour combinations specifically. From using it as line, creating shaped voids, manipulating the fabric to building extreme texture, that’s what makes me excited about sticking pointy things with threads all adanglish through cloth.

Collision: the work begins, Contextural Fibre Arts Co-operative, journal: lessons to learn, Leighton work

working on while working on

Posted on February 24, 2016July 4, 2016 by arlee

Though i have pulled old work to finish and am excited about that, i am still working on new work to keep the juices flowing, and prevent the stagnation that occurs for me when i work only on one work!

“HAHA HEEHEE HOHO” as the song goes.

The upcoming Leighton Art Centre exhibition is the “big piece” this year (so far). I got a bit bogged down with it and decided to forgo the “companion piece” (“Body of Water”). The figure has a bit of work on her which i am letting puzzle for awhile, but i decided the background she was on is perfect for the actual exhibit piece. (I can always make more blue fabric for her.)

This is the original inspiration:

I have gone many ways since seeing it last year, with copious notes, sketches and samplings.Riffing off your own work is hard enough, but to use someone else’s deliberately WITHOUT COPYING, is even more problematic. One does not wish to copy, emulate or reproduce, one wishes to “respond”. Blech. In the final analysis, it was the sketch of the parts that fired the stove:

I’m therefore pretending that the bare bones shapes are mine. How would i translate them into cloth and technique?

That blue background already has a vague moon shape in the form of a rusted ring. Play off that then.

I made fabrics deliberately for this work, drag ’em out.
The grevillea ecoprint perfectly reflects the batik cracks in the original Leighton cloth.

Looks a little dry though:

I used to paint, paint with paint, paint with dye. So paint with some dye:

Now it’s juicy. Picks up the colour again of the original.

I then got hung up on what stitch to use, what colour the stitching should be, where should i put the stitch………

Well, duh. Blue, on the blue sections, and teeny crackle effect as i did on “All Water Under the Bridge” in 2014:

For reference sake, those stitches are probably 30-40 per square inch. Using a 20wt cotton was more than myopic but the effect is fantastic.

Onwards and upwards. On March 12th, the participating artists are going out to the Centre again to again review the originals. Think i’ll take this moon piece with me, there’ll be some stitch done on it by then–not going to let the original scare me, just want to see how approximate my take is without being too much of an approximation!

a collusion of ideas, journal: lessons to learn

texture

Posted on February 17, 2016February 17, 2016 by arlee

THIS is why i love hand embroidery. You are just not going to get that texture with a machine.

You can sort of see in the above photo that the “moon” is not really flat. Another bonus of my hand embroidery is that because i use no hoop, some areas will become more relief than others. While some may find this difficult to control and end up with bunchies, pulled in areas and uneven edges, i’ve done it so many times, that i know when the tension of my needle and thread has to be sparing.

The way the fabric moves on its own is another part of the joy.

And now i am looking at this piece from 2012, never finished. It’s quite crunchy as it is, due to the heavier silk and the netting over some areas, but i’m thinking i’d like to do something with it now too.

Creative Strength Training with Jane Dunnewold, Deliberation--do something you don't do--or haven't in awhile, journal: lessons to learn

deliberation

Posted on February 2, 2016February 2, 2016 by arlee

I’ve been immersed in lessons and trying things out from Jane Dunnewold’s “Creative Strength Training” classes. I can’t share what i’m doing really, except in the vaguest of terms, but looking at shape and colour has been quite invigorating. The exercises have me looking again at old work, refiguring how i did things, how i illustrated and interpreted concepts, developed ideas. That’s a good boot in the bazotski.

I have also re-realized (!) that my biggest obstacle to getting in there and DOING something is my ever present mess. No matter how many times i tidy, i can’t find what i’m looking for. It’s time to get mean and clean out the debris. There are things in that chaos that are never going to get used. It takes up work space, storage space and head space. There’s a BIG BIG BIG purge coming. EDIT: when this was written, i hadn’t gone through the bins and drawers yet–now you can reap 😉 But i did dredge out fabrics i had forgotten about and the colour is juicy, so why not?

Cleaning out also means cleaning out thoughts that say “you can’t do that, because it’s too pretty, too common, a compromise.” I’m not talking about following trends, making the same things others are, toeing the line with fitting in (forget THAT) –let’s just do those things that seem counter-intuitive to what i have been doing, and see what happens. A test if you will, to see what i can do that is still me. It’s NOT going to kill me after all. This might be a year of just, well, just “screwing around”. As much as i want to be taken seriously, make serious work, maybe it’s not going to happen for me. Am i trying too hard? Maybe that is the problem.

Then again, maybe there can be TWO of me. I think of a certain friend who is known for her gorgeous hand stitched, very colourful nature/floral work–who secretly used to make the most amazing quirky monstery looking rude dolls, with few realizing the two very different approaches were from the same person. As she posted: “With these creatures, i explore the darker side of my creativity.” Maybe i need to do the brighter side!

Colour. Colour. Colour. We all react different ways to certain hues. I’m afraid i’m afraid of it lately. Deliberately then, i have thrown this together.

It’s an “abstract”, something else i’m not terribly fond of, but it may become story-ish. BUT it doesn’t have to be “story-ish” either, BUT i don’t want to just do 11tybajillion pieces of running stitch attached boro ripped frayed edge cloth….. but let’s see where it will go. 😦 😉 🙂

Tacked:

I made an oopsie with the flannelette i always use for depth and stability, but most of it is not visible anyways! (Usually when there’s a print, i put the white side against the fabric.)

And the thread choices. I tried not to be too matchy-matchy, but i don’t want to be contrasting harshly either. The purple bothers me but i’ll just have to work with it. I don’t want splotches that draw the eye, but i think i have figured out a way to prevent that, or at least make it integrate. I LIKE the purple in the fabric, but the thread choice is a bit problematic, as i’m not sure which shade will work. Will probably do that last then so i have time to think about it and see what happens with everything else.

Since this is an exercise in colour for me, rather than just shape, its working title is “Meet Me In the Middle”. Part of the goal is to add “layers”, not in the sense of applying more fabrics to the top, but to build them with different thread treatments and pattern. Complex cloth, slow cloth, whatever it is, it will be as it is.

I can always cut it up or incorporate it later in something else! Nothing is set in stone right now, just “Screwing Around With Intent”. 🙂

a collusion of ideas, Creative Strength Training with Jane Dunnewold, journal: lessons to learn

resistance to the machine

Posted on January 25, 2016January 25, 2016 by arlee

I talked about Stubborn in a previous post. She’s the stoodio visitor that puts the blocks to the flow. Whether it’s the thought that you’re not going to try anything new or daring, or the one that says i’m already good at what i do, so why try anything else, Stubborn refuses to admit that the tools can be used in concert. Stubborn is sister also to Complacency–and the rest of the siblings: Boredom, Stagnation, and Predictability.

Look at that piece above–what joy, colour, expression!!! It’s got hand AND machine embroidery, done at a time when i was realizing that they could be used together, and that there was a strange pleasure in doing more hand work. I had decried that in previous years–too used to silly little florals and heavy ecclesiastical work samples, it bored me.

Serendipitously this morning my computer was acting very very strange. Even after changing the battery in the keyboard, i was having problems, so decided to let it have a rest 🙂 (Still acting weird, but at least it’s working now.) Instead i fired up the sewing machine and pulled out threads and memories of just noodling around. No purpose, no grand idea, no use for it, but hey, i had FUN.

I might add a bit of hand stitching to it, but it’s not an under pressure piece, so i might not too!

journal: lessons to learn

love continues

Posted on January 21, 2016January 21, 2016 by arlee

Happy 12th Anniversary to my dear Greyman! 12 years of “sheer hell” has had its ups and downs, but at the end of every day, i love you and want you to be safe and happy. Kisses!!!!!

Creative Strength Training with Jane Dunnewold, journal: lessons to learn

vein efforts

Posted on January 20, 2016January 20, 2016 by arlee

(Thank you, i am well aware of the difference between “vein” and “vain”.)

Digging through myself, unearthing the quarry (ha, two meanings there as well), finding the truth in the bones, mining the veins (in vain? one hopes not), exploring, re-finding again: what’s in my bloodstream, thought stream? Mixed metaphors and analogies, as complicated and as simple as i can be.

I started doing this ahead of the Creative Strength Training class (Jane Dunnewold Studios) without knowing what i was looking for. I’m looking though because i need to–the knowledge of the class and signing up for it came after my search started, so i might be ahead of the game. Or predictably for Self, i am assuming, second guessing, wandering off in the wrong direction, jumping on my horse and riding off in all directions. Today is day one of the first class. I’m not going to be sharing a lot of what i am doing, because i respect the teacher’s intellectual property and copyrights, etc, but some stuff i can, if i want to.

First lesson learned indirectly: RESISTANCE IS FUTILE. I admit my feet were dragging and i could feel my heels digging DEEP into the stoodio floor, as i sat at my worktable and Began. So i follow along and do what i’m suggested to do to pull things out–what’s so hard about that? It WAS hard, that start. Then it got easier–and led off to other thoughts, questions, possibilities because i let them happen. Stream of consciousness, opening up, blurring my own borders. You know that “wise” saying “Never assume, because it makes an ass out of you and me“? True, so true. The prompt given was something i never would have thought of on my own, would never have stuck to to dig deeper, would have felt put upon, phony for my purposes and pointless in MY grand scheme of things. Stubborn. Stubborn can mean holding your own ground, but it can also make you rather lonely. For it’s own sake and boundaries, it’s a one sided relationship. Courage of conviction is one thing, unrelenting stubborn is entirely a different animal, a growly, snarly, blindered, solitary herd of one.

But that prompt funnily enough did work–oh yeah, it took 2 and a half hours to get where i thought there was some truth and possibility, but that was the point too. There are no easy answers, but oh, the search and the journey will surprise. There was a LOT of writing, a LOT written that was more question than answer or revelation, some paint and colouring, and several cups of coffee.

A glimmer of an idea for one of these. Wandering with purpose.

Collision: the work begins, journal: lessons to learn

borgle, borgle, borgling

Posted on January 18, 2016January 18, 2016 by arlee

The Stately Barr Manor Stoodio is a mess. There are a few organized plateaus in it, but for the most part, it’s adrift and rudderless. (I’ll spare you the photos: you’ve seen them before: “look at how creative a spot i have with all the mess–*****gimme a gold star, a medal for my joie de vivre, lackadaisical attitude.”) I could spend the whole day, and more, straightening up, but have decided as long as most of the piles are hidden ie put away, and i can grab fastly what i actually need, it’s alright to not have one of those pristine magazine perfect pretty places with the comfy chair, the flowers and sunlight hitting hung prisms (the ones that blind you when you are actually working, not just admiring with the reporter/photographer….). And of course, there’s the rest of the house–put this away, find a spot for the crockpot, walk the dog, interact meaningfully (or not) with Significant Other (because it’s not always about undying soulful love), what’s for supper? Delay, delay, delay. Avoidance.

Habit.

Something simple to begin with. Work/stitch/research/notate one hour a day. Even if it’s 15 minutes here, 5 there and 29 there, it will add up. One of my embroidery heroes spends 6 hours a day stitching—it’s rare i have an uninterrupted period like that, unless there’s a deadline 🙂 Do the basic layout. Lay out the tools i need. Get the notes handy. Load the camera. Thread a couple of needles. Use the threaded needles until they’re needing reloading. Get off the &*^%ing computer. ONE HOUR. Otherwise, i dither around so much, fretting about starting, that i never start. Well, why don’t i have something to work on in front of the evening tubage?? Who’s fault is that? Certainly can’t blame the crockpot or Significant Other. Acceptance.

Habit.

So, first i made a pile. Threaded needles. Loaded the camera. ETC.

Then i started.

Two hours to do the five lines of Borgle. Strip was 39′ long by 5.5″ wide, now 4.5″ wide. (Good to know the draw-in/shrinkage.)

Admiring the blues together.

Next step, start the browns stitching.

Admittedly today was a day off from the fffFlower Mines, so i had more time than an hour. Lookit! Lookit! Lookit!! (Remember being 6 and showing Mom you could “swim”?) “WOW. That is SO exciting, lumpy and all borgly”, i heard you say under your breath. (Yes i did too.) Lookit!: i’m swimming! Yeah, my feet are still on the bottom of the lake, but i’m in the water, hey?

I also heard “WTF is a borgle??????” When the blankets get all twangled and stuck under your hip and you can’t straighten them out in the dark with your eyes still closed to cover yourself in the middle of a freezing cold night, as in damn it, the blankets are all borgled, so that you have to actually get up, turn on the light and remake the bed, thereby thoroughly waking yourself up so you can’t get back to sleep even though now warmly covered and comfy, that’s a borgle. It can also apply to the state of the stoodio. Also, known for my purposes, as one of my “semi-patented” FrankenStitch techniques.

*****Now i can have a semi-soggy Hero Biscuit with my coffee.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I have had a few puzzled enquiries WHY i would take a “motivational” course. Because i *know* HOW to do things, because i’m tired of classes where you “make marks” with sticks, feathers, charcoal, watered down ink and possibly dirt and blood. Because i want to know WHY i do –or do not–do what i do, and because i want things back in me that fell out. I want to know HOW i work, because it’s forest for the trees right now, and i want back under the skin down to the bones that propped up all of this. Because i don’t care about deconstructed screen prints, new ways to use a chain stitch, evolving methods to ecoprint or how to colour in zentangles. I want WHY i need, want, have to do— any of these things should i choose to are only tools, they’re not the muscle memory and firing synapse, the JOY and pleasure i’ve lost. I wouldn’t call this a “motivational” course, but HELL, if it gets my motivation back, call it whatever *you* want. (You’re probably in the midst of a “Soul journalling” class, and ain’t that “motivational”? (A chacun son gout, with appropriate accents agui and circonflexe.)

If a bone is set wrong, sometimes it has to be re-broken to set properly.

a collusion of ideas, journal: lessons to learn

mining, trying to go beyond the status quo

Posted on January 17, 2016January 17, 2016 by arlee

“Mining” =digging through one’s own life and art for inspiration. (Or is it an avoidance tactic or procrastination?) I also think of my last “word for the year, (Origin), something i don’t do anymore, because seriously, like the magical flip of a calendar page from one year to the next is making your life better (NOT), neither will one word define my practice.

Origin(al paths)
08 Dec 2011

noun
1.something from which anything arises or is derived; source; fountainhead: to follow a stream to its origin.
2.rise or derivation from a particular source: the origin of a word.
3.the first stage of existence; beginning
4.ancestry; parentage; extraction
5.Anatomy a.the point of derivation. b.the more fixed portion of a muscle.

So i’ll acknowledge–or not–the source, the origin, whether in words or in the art as i see fit. Look at all those definitions, how can things ever be original?????????? Sounds SO pointless and frustrating to try–but i/we continue, because i/we Must, i/we Have to, i/we Need to. I might “reference” someone, i might “be informed by” something else (ArtSpeak hooray……..), but in the end, it’s me me me all the way ’cause no one forced my hand to move the way it did.

I’ve been looking at really old work, old in the sense that when i started playing with textiles and techniques, all i had done to that point was sew clothing, do machine applique and embroider with only satin stitch, french knots and chain stitch! When the internet finally exploded (2005-2009) with art and tutorials, i tried everything! From melting and burning paper and plastics, beading, inchies and atc’s and postcards, making boxes of various shapes and sizes, from stuffed figures to sewn art journals, i was so excited by all the potential that i often posted blog entries 4 times a day, loaded dozens of photos a week to Flickr, and enthusiastically collected junk and ephemera every where i went. If there was an exchange, i was in, a round robin, i was in; i even initiated a few projects myself with a textile journal going/coming from around the world, a CSI inspired inchies exchange and two (three?) versions of an exquisite corpse game in fibre.

There’s little from that time period i am actually still proud of. A few bits and pieces from that period still hold my heart, but more for the recognition that i could do with textiles something i couldn’t with pen and ink, than with anything truly thoughtfully done.

“Emergency Self Esteem Kit” 2008:

More photos and the story, here.

“Alchemy” shrinebook 2009 :

Cover of “Sea of Electricity” sewn art journal 2007

Below, Copper pod hand stitched, left unadorned, right with free motion on soluble inserted in openings, 2007

Below, “Artefacts” 2006 (4 separate pieces), small dimensional beaded pieces. (Over embellished i see now, and combining two different ideas really, but there are mind jogs of possibility there.)

Noticing a lot of red, and rich deep colours, lots of texture, machine work, layering, can i work this love of visual and tactile excitement back into current work? Way back in the 90’s at Capilano College doing the Textile Arts program, it was being exposed to the idea of texture, depth, THE FEEL of fabric and fabric manipulation techniques that got my gears going. While my current work IS very sensory to the hand and eye, i’m still feeling the lack of something, undefined, ineffable. Colour? Placement of elements? Concept? (Shudder) Technique?

I think that the next few months (at least) is going to be a lot of searching, sampling and studying. I’m watching a few others in the blogosphere going through various degrees of this themselves right now, so it’s not just me. I won’t be satisfied until i’m satisfied. With only one deadline (currently), i do have the time and inclination. The Dunnewold course starts in 3 days, and i’m looking forward to that, trying to let go of misconceptions and stubborn-ness: “This is the way i’ve always done it, why should i change? Ain’t no-one gonna tell me what to do.” There’s a little part of me however stuffed down in the subconscious, that is trying to get stronger–after all, if you learn something new everyday, you know you’re not dead.

EDIT: I realize this sounds all dry and possibly off putting–i want the joy back too.

journal: lessons to learn

self directed workshop, part 2

Posted on January 13, 2016January 13, 2016 by arlee

Okay, i’m not sure where this will go, but i actually made myself go in there, and WORK. Maybe it was futzing around, but i WAS in there, and i DID get “something” done. (Edit, 3 hours later: i have no choice but to spend a lot of time in there–while walking DogFaced Girl along the riverbank Tues morn, i fell 8 feet! My damn knee went the wrong way and the next couple of days will be spent sitting, but not at the dread day job at the fffFlower Mines..)

Not sure either if it helped for current goals and deadlines, but i feel better. No great revelations, no OMG moments, just going through writing down some “why’s”, some possible interpretations. A lot of “if i want to do this, how could i do it? Do i need the actual materials and skills to do it? What if i could magically do whatever i pleased, with no thought of how, the medium, the level of commitment?” This approach worked a couple of years ago: to that point, i had worked smaller, and asked myself “What would you do if you could work BIG?” Subsequent works were larger, and now i’m feeling i need to go back the other way: smaller!

So, whatever happens, happens. This is a self directed workshop, and rarely do bits done in workshops become masterpieces. It’s a skill mind time, not an end result.

Paint outs of the original Leighton fabric:

I decided to go with the blues. It relates to the subject, it has an affinity with previous work about inner and outer landscapes, it’s do-able.

Possible Boro style stitching:

While i like the idea, it has nothing to do with the “plans”. File under Possible Use Later In Other Work.

Small study:

Two different Valdani colourways above–i had to let go of the idea that anyone would notice the microscopic differences….they’re going to “read” the same on the blue with the stitch technique, so why worry?????

I do love that licheny looking overdyed rusted cotton—-unfortunately the only other piece of rusted cotton i have is so heavily crusted, that i know it will be a bitch to stitch through. A lesson to learn there too: control. Too much is too much. And this little study piece has possibilities for the larger work, so i’m on the right track, however winding it has become.

I’ve been writing notes to myself and taping them up in front of myself:

I WILL get through this, i WILL. I also signed up for Jane Dunnewold’s Creative Strength Training online workshop. With the exchange rate as it is, it cost this Canadian another 121 on top of the US price, but what the hell…..I don’t have to travel, the woman knows what she’s talking about, and i have to stop dragging my heels about what’s going on!

What are *your* coping strategies?